Don't leave a conversation at the point of complaint.
Complaints seem to come naturally to us, don’t they? But it does nothing for our soul. Complaints don’t justify anything, and despite what we think, they don’t make us feel better. Complaints are corrupting. They bring strife. They make us mean, self-seeking, spiteful and bitter. That’s not pretty.
God doesn't want us to wallow in a dirty pool of complaints. We need to stay in communion with Him. God will mould us, shape us, strengthen us, and grow us through the pain of the process if we don’t leave the conversation at the point of the complaint. That's where real honesty is at.
Do you take your complaints to God? Do you allow God to carry the conversation past those complaints?
God wants us to plant a garden of beauty instead of sit in the ashes of loss.
God wants us to wear beautiful garments of praise that reflect like a shield against the poverty of thinking that complaining brings.
This was part of a Threshing Floor conversation and I want to extract it separately. You can read the full conversation here.
If we look at Joseph’s incredible story in the bible, we see a man who had a lot of reasons to complain and lament. Yet, we never read of his emotional or mental anguish.
All throughout the bible, we do read about people’s honesty and complaints before God. The bible doesn't gloss over those experiences. But we don’t read that Joseph ever succumbed to the complaints process. That’s not to say he didn’t carry grief or go through the usual feelings we would all experience over what happened to him. Those emotions were a natural part of his journey but he seemed to staunchly control their ability to overpower him.
When his brothers turned up in Egypt decades after they betrayed him, the grief he’d carried all that time heaved from him in uncontrollable weeping that was so loud it resonated throughout the palace.
We can look at other people in the bible who struggled with where they found themselves in life, and God.
Abraham negotiated with God, Jacob wrestled with God, David felt abandoned by God, Jeremiah said God tricked him, Moses complained to God about the burden of his responsibility, Job became resentful, Naomi was bitter, Esther was scared, Hannah was desperate. They all felt forsaken at some point!
God was willing to hear their honesty. But that wasn’t the end of their conversations with Him. They continued walking with Him despite their feelings until God made Himself known to them. They went through years, even decades, of uncertainty and long-suffering. The point is, they finally saw God in those experiences. And from out of those experiences, from the rubble, from the ashes, God rebuilt.
Are you prepared to walk through the process of pain and sit in the seat of meakness until God makes Himself known there?
Glorify God
Joseph was already resolved in his mind by the time his brothers showed up in Egypt. He knew what they had meant for evil, God had meant for good (Genesis 50:20). It took 22 years of suffering and humbling for that appointment as Pharaoh's 2IC to be sealed. Here was finally his restitution.
What enabled him?
We don't read of him complaining or lamenting. Something he’d seen in dreams as a young man carried him through and caused his tenacious belief in God. But even when God promoted him to be the second most powerful man in the world, God wasn’t finished. Joseph missed his father and endured the burden of his dad thinking he was dead. Finally, God justified all the wrongs done to him, bringing his father and his whole family to live with him where they all prospered.
That took his entire lifetime!
But look at how God remembered Joseph even after he died. God ensured his bones were carried back to his homeland long after his death, not left in the land of his slavery. Yes. He was still in the land of his slavery even while he ruled. God's purposes were vastly different to his own expectations, but he fulfilled what God had planned and he flourished.
Philippians 1:6 (NIV)
being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
Are you ruling yet, where you have been enslaved?
Joseph’s experience mirrors his outcome. He overruled his lamentations in his circumstantial slavery, and ended up ruling over the modern world at that time. I don’t think that was a coincidence, nor was it only the blessing that God had for Him (not that that’s any small thing – we all want God’s blessing). I believe that is what God’s restoration really looks like and what it looks like for recompense to take place.
Joseph’s recompense was borne out of his fortitude and faithful attitude towards the goodness of God. When God means something for good, it’s not just better, it’s not partial, it’s a complete 360 turnaround that declares His greatness and demands His glory because nothing else could surpass it and no one else could achieve it. It’s more than anything we could hope for or imagine (Ephesians 3:20).
Wrong Conclusions
When we don’t give glory to God and give Him thanks, our thoughts become darkened and we come to wrong conclusions.
Romans 1:21
For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened.
Do you think you experience lack in your life? - Relationships? Unmet expectations? Unfulfilled hope?
When you perceive lack in your life do you give thanks to God that He will bring recompense for what has been lost? What is your conversation like with Him? Do you even have conversation with Him that goes beyond complaint; that is restorative?
Underneath our inability to give thanks in all circumstances is an unwillingness to give God glory because we perceive there is lack. We must acknowledge if we harbour offense against God. Anger through unmet expectations is a real thing, but it’s dangerous to stay in that place.
How do we change that buried thinking?
Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.
Do we trust Him with our future?
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
Only when we trust Him, can we surrender enough to thank Him in all circumstances. Only then can we praise His ability to strengthen our back to bear it and be able to see how He will work it out.
Mark 14:38
Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.”
Instead of asking, why? Ask, what do you want me to learn? Ask, where are you wanting to take me?
After you’ve brought your complaints to God, listen to where He would take your conversation. Stop looking to others to define you, equip you, and direct you. God holds your future. Don't place other people in the place of greatest influence in your life.
Dig trenches and plant your seeds of hope and move forward, based on God's intent for you. It may take a long time of internal restructuring, but it is that character building that is the foundation to all that God has planned.
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